Disease O the Day: F.A.R.D. (also known as F.R.D.)

Inside Joke: No way backwards wallpaper family!

Did you know that Town House Crackers are the BEST Crackers in the WORLD?!

Evidence:
1) Kings eat them
2) God eats on the weekends and made up the story about the snake who tricked Adam and Eve. The truth is that they chose the apples over the crackers...we cant have that.
3) Lincoln was shot cuz he ate popcorn at the theatre instead of Town House Crackers
4) You know why Alan Rickman is so great? No not from the Great Juice or Fanastic Steak....its cuz o' the Town Hiz-ous Crack-azz, son!

Best thing for beginning 2002: Alan Rickman eating Town House Crackers with Cream cheese while feeding his pet bat a bowl of wax fruit as he watches Trading Spaces and listening to Dashboard Confessional.

Can do. Will do. DONE!
-Jack Stone (lego legend)

I like to avoid doing non-humor type things on this site but I have something I would like to share, just to show that you can't always be funny.

Untitled

Destiny of conscience make me a hermit
Deeper within lies the answer
but it's out of order
Come back later
I'm out of time

I want to hug my knees,
cry in the closet,
run away
from the confusion of myself
Click my heels three times
I haven't moved

The asylum of my mind
I'm in a straight jacket
I thought I was a visitor
I fear it's my home
Absent drawings,
mumbling to self,
rock back and forth
I hate this place
A colorless confinement
Surrounded by mirrors
Forced reflection
I cracked the walls
I dont want to see.

I'm torn in half
I dont know where to begin
So hand me the glue
Paste on the armor
There are too many layers,
so it all gives way

I'm trapped inside myself
Every door is locked
I've lost the key
So hand me the flashlight
Wander aimlessly
I dont want to find my fears

There's no gold here
Only the epiphany,
of pain.

DA END!

Today in lunch I was talking to Tony and Elias while the others got their calorie filled Wendy's..I usually dont go to lunch with them but today was like Cut Day so it happens. We got into this convo about the Lost Boys in Never Never Land, you know with Peter Pan and Hook. So here is what I was thinking, you know how they imagined their food and it would appear? Well what if it was all in their head that they were eating all this food, when in reality they are starving to death....? Hmm...It would make for a bad movie then when The Lost Boys fight Hook. It would be like watching old people eat applesauce. Dont get my wrong, I like applesauce, just not when its being mashed by some 70 year old toothless gums. Thats a nice image for ya.

Inside Joke with Liz: I WANDer...cmon I said it like 3 times.
It was the funniest thing of the day. Go Liz. And if you see her online first tell her I love her, then try to figure out what her profile is cuz i have no clue. I bet the Japanese couldnt even figure it out.

See you later homes

There is this thing called a uh...what-cha-ma-call-it, a Math Midterm. And I kinda should study for it seeing that I totally BOMBED the first part and eventually I will study but its hard when you have NO motivation. I hate wasting my time with math. After 6th grade its totally useless. I think they ran out of subjects to teach back in the day so they kept going with Math. We need a new subject. How about Mind Control, nah that could end bad. What about Space Travel...eh, it would be like semi interesting physics...Oh I got it, they'll let us watch tv! Excellent.

Danielle's Words: Oh God, please save me from suburban motherhood...

I had the words to dis song in my head: Again I go Unnoticed by Dashboard Confessional

OH SNAP!

I'm back...from the dead. Nah just kidding, stop screaming in terror the neighbors will think awful things.

I almost didnt have a Phrase O the Week. (GASP!)..I know, its crazy. But after Dan informed me of his, Jesse, and Tony's performance at Liz's lacrosse game, I knew who would win. This weeks is brought to you by Tony (applause). They went to Liz's game with signs and his just took the cake. It read: It's falsi that rivalsi is bad.
I can only wish my last name was Rivalsi...

I missed listening to dis song: The Places You Fear the Most:Dashboard Confessional

Welcome Back Mer

I must away to England...
-Alan Rickman as Colonel Brandon in Sense and Sensibility

I must away to Emerson. (Points out yonder, guestimating where Emerson is) To Boston!

P.S.- Ding Dong the witch is dead...witch = economics

REALLY GOOD Song: Saints and Sailors by Dashboard Confessional

I took the test of Jesse's site to see what Super Mario character I am...

You are... Yoshi, the cool dinosaur!
You are a hip critter. You showed up fasionably late with Super Mario World and have started launching your own career since then. In maybe 10-15 years, your popularity will rival Mario's. Not that you're competing with him. He's your bud. You're good at getting and keeping friends, and they value you for that. After all, who else would carry them on their back through ice, fire, and rain? Sometimes you think you're taken for granted, but you know that your friends have your back. Of course they do. Who would screw over Yoshi?

(I apologize for the absence of the picture that came with it, I dont know how to get it on the site)

Oregon Trail is SUCH a good game. Not the new versions those are too complex. The orginial kicks arse. You watch your journey through a little box. See the oxen take you across the U.S. I recommend being a Doctor when you start out. You get a decent amount of money and the satisfaction of helping the sick.
Hunting is always the best. Once I shot a bird and it landed in a stream with an amusing splash. I always feel guilty shooting the deer until I have like no food at all, then I shoot them like it's my job. If a buffalo or bear wonders over I only shoot one, since you can only take about 200lbs back, and most of it would go bad if you gots too much. The squirrels are fun. I wind up wasting 30 bullets on one before I give up. Stupid squirrels...only one pound of meat. How can one survive on that?!
Might I also say that the sounds are great. There's the bad noise: Bam-bah-dah, which occurs when someone is sick, you get lost, there's bad water, you're carriage catches fire, you lose food, a thief steal stuff, etc. But there is also a good noise: Do-do-dah-do, this one is heard mostly when you find fruit or someone is better. Come to think of it, you get GYPT on the good sounds.
Oh and it's always the best when someone dies cuz they play that sad southern-like music and you can write crazy tings on the headstone.

Shout out to Jessica DeMarie, she likes to kick it oldschool whenever possible. In her honor I will say the following: Right now I am eating an Oreo and I think my dog just farted...

Thank God I have a teacher like Mr.Mazzei, its so great when he's absent once a week. Soon I'm gonna forget I even have a creative writing class.

So today I go to leave school and I notice that my rearview mirror is crooked. After I fixed it I noticed my parking sticker was gone. I then went back over to where Dan, Jesse and Danielle were and they tell me that my back door was slightly open. Some genius broke into my car and stole my parking sticker. Now I call this person a genius because they will be caught in a matter of days. They did such a crappy job at covering their tracks it's almost insulting. Obviously it must be a first timer, I mean cmon, they left the back door open AND didnt even bother to fix my rearview mirror. Who ever it was they are SO screwed its not even funny. I went to Mr.Cruz and he's more than happy to catch this kid and he could even arrest him/her cuz they broke into my car and stole something. I am honored in a way because Mr.Cruz told me this is a new one. To think, I was the first person in sachem to have someone steal my parking sticker right out of my car. But our school is so filled with dirtbags I thought this would have already happened. The desperation of these kids is amazing. I can't wait til Mr.Cruz screams at this kid, it's gonna be great, I wish I could watch. I love Mr.Cruz.

"Mad props" to Liz for recommending Ozma, in her own words, "they're like weezer but happier."

Cutting class is So addictive. Before last week I cut class a total of once, maybe twice. The last week occurred and I think I cut at least 3 times or more, I dont remember, it's all a blur. It's so easy to leave when the teacher doesnt show up. The glory of a substitute's face. Then the party ends, the teacher returns. You spend time day dreaming about how you could not be doing work. I cant wait for college. All those nice brakes in the day.
Going back to cutting, I find it so odd when you cut and go somewhere when school is in session. Every place seems so empty, except for moms. I've always been a fan of spotting out new moms and their attire; the Keds, the messy hair, the sweatpants. So casual it could kill.

I have this immense desire to write something amazing, perhaps I'll have the chance now that I quit Drama with all that Jesus Christ Superstar Biz. I have my reasons...so do Dan and Jesse! Yeah us. (Visions all three of us running out from around a corner in a run)

Sound O the Day: Pouring of Ice Tea into a glass....ah Ice Tea..

It's funny...your worst nightmare always seems so far away. But then all of a sudden, there it is. Like a monsterous titlewave. You try to escape, but you can't. You struggle, you struggle, and you struggle. Your Desperate cries unheard. Then something strangle happens. You stop struggling. Your Cries take flight. You forget you're drowning.
-Dark Harbor

Stupid Emerson essay. It has to get done, but all I want to do is watch movies and listen to music. I wish I didn't have to apply to college. Stupid conventional world.

Friday night while looking at the stars with Tony (before Katie Woz came to join us), he said something that is so interesting. That night I just felt like watching the star and thinking about stuff. So i did. Talking with Tony, he said that when he was younger he thought we were all inside some kids shoe box and the stars in the sky were holes he poked in the top. We were his bugs in a way. And if his mom ever opened the top, we were all screwed. It's such a cool thing to think about. Tony is a genius...of sorts.

Third Eye Blind: Motorcycle Driveby
I'm back on a Third Eye Blind kick

Hey kids its that time...cookies? NO fool! Phrase O the Week (trumpits are heard in the backround). This week's happened today in good ol' drama with that ever so talented John Langdon, more like John Fiddle Faddle. (FYE-Fiddle Faddle=SUCK!) But the winning phrase escaped Cara Alousio's lips. After she said "hey guys watch this," we all turned giving her our full attention...and she jumps. A totally random jump. We look at her, unimpressed. She says: I jump for fun, cuz I'm on drugs.

Congrats to Cara and her drugs. We all salute you with the mating dance.

Other announcements: Tonight if your not doing anything come to the North Cafeteria for Dave Lagmana's Eagle Scout FUN-draiser. Come for the spagetti, come for the improv, come for punch and pie. It will be fun times OR ELSE (dun Dun DUN). The "hotness" starts at 7.

Note: No gurantee of punch or pie.

I'm out like an obese boy playing a strenuous activity that involves throwing a rubber ball at others.

Holy Crap I hate technology!! The other day this POS wouldnt let me update, then today it had what i wrote, but didnt publish cuz it wouldnt let me, saved..and then i thought i published that, then went and updated with what you see below. Thinking I did a double publish...BUT NO. When i updated it erased the other days! Then i went to rewrite it and I'm stupid and got that erased as well. Now i want to punch the wall.

(Counts backward from 10) Anyway, here is what i can remember

And Memory Says:

Aint nothing cooler than lunges. You're not cool unless you lunge.
(The following was said by Merry McEvanson while lunging to the mad-phat beats in Old Navy, the only place to go to get down)

Merry later on asked if she could hold in her farts til she got to my car where upon getting inside she would repeatedly rip em til we passed out in a type of "gas coma."

*The past statement was partially a fabracation, its a take on reality. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO FART YOURSELF INTO A COMA.

That is all

Random things on my mind:

1) I have a Harry Potter scarf (giggles)
2) Dark Harbor was a crazy flick.
3) I dont wanna do my homework...what else is new
4) I could go for some cornbread
5) I own a mouse, Milo is the name
6) My last three statements have started with "I" probably because I'm an egomaniac and such
7) Mariah Carey is on the tv right now and I'm having these incredible urges to punch it
8) (blank stare)
9) Fanny Pinchin (ask Maggie Devito why she writes that on her papers)
10) Video Killed the Radio Star.....and he walked cause they jury said there was "lack of evidence," so wrong...

Today, both Lisa and I came to the conclusion that librarians are funny. The I went a leap further and realized a more appropriate name would be Book Elves. Think about it. All librarians are small, have glasses, like books...no real HUMAN has all those qualities. The book elves live in the inchanted woods of literature, near the stream of knowledge. All you need to do is enter through the golden arch of the "library gates." Obviously they disguise themselves as "librarians" to avoid attention at their real identity. It would most likely create mass panic if people were told the truth behind what is to be found in the deepest vaults of these Library's....(pause for dramatic effect)...Elf Gold. But shhhh! Don't let them know I told you the truth. I doubt they will go online and discover this, because they dont like the computers, they like the books better.

Galaxy Quest Quote: Give him a big hand, he's British!

Simplicity is Genius

I love to procrastinate. I got so much homework that I should be doing at this moment, but I'm not. It's so much easier to just hang around, watch tv, listen to music, play with my dog, eat a bagel, poop...I mean (looks away).

I just want this unnecessary High School work to end. Go on the college and be able to fully focus on what I actually WANT to do work for: Custodial Arts. You have no idea of the glory that emulates from the magical flush of a toilet, or the art of sweeping the floors. It's the most beautiful thing in the world (bits lip to hold back the tears).

Song I am listening to at this VERY moment: Where's my mind?-Pixies
Next song: Talk show host-Radiohead
People I want to be hanging out with: You (naturally), Alan Rickman, and Gillian Anderson

Day dreamer

Movie of the week: Dogma

Yeah Alan Rickman!

Rickman as the Voice of God: I'm pissed off is what i am.

So on the second of Jan. I titled it as the 3rd, good thing i know how to count. It only took me the whole school day before I realized. I just wanted it to be Thursday so bad I thought by writing it was would allow me to think it actually WAS Thursday. Which means the 3rd would become the 4th, as such, I wouldnt attend school on Friday cuz i would think it was Saturday. Then for the rest of my life I would be off by a day. Be a day late to parties and all. But maybe I was the only one on REAL time. Maybe today really is Sunday...which means everything is a lie! Christmas is really on the 24th, holidays, birthdays, anniversary's are all celebrated late. Man, that sucks.