2001 will perish today when Father Time stikes midnight. And now...A Year In Review.

Favorite Tings O 2001:

Animal: Monkey
Excetion: All variations of poop (i.e.-poo, poopie, po2p, da poopsie)
Craze: Harry Potter...yea Snape!
Holiday: SYAG jersey week
Group Activity: Box People
Best way to eat a Jelly Bean: From my bellybutton
Substitute Teacher: Meatball
Boyfriend: Dan (but you better watch out for Alan Rickman)
Show: Temptation Island 2...oh the trash
Class: Economics with Mr.E and Spelmenator; its just all about the graphs
Hangout: Tony's
Accent: high pitch, well i guess it's Swedish..? (i.e.- zee kitty, un beanies)
Song: Inspector Gadget Techno Remix
Ting to do to Friends: TP their cars
Late Night Activity: Gnoming
Way to Fall Asleep: While watching a Disney movie
Rebel thing: Dropping off Liz in the middle of her block at 2 am with the lights off and as she suddles to the house with a dress on,her mom waits at the door
Gift: Fart Machine

And my favorite thing..is having an amazing group of friends. Kisses to all.

I havent been able to update for a while, so hopefully this goes threw. I did have a phrase o the week BUT it didnt post it and yesterday there was a better phrase. While driving back to Sang's house, Dan's car ran into some trouble, but thankfully some Russian men at the gas station were able to "fix carrrr" (like they do is Russia). Jen Akenback (last name is def spelled wrong, I just used the Sound It Out Method) was with us last night, and the Phrase O the Week goes to her and her use of a Russian accent when she said: Oh, you are So Rebel!

Hopefully she'll hang out with us agian so her chances of being awarded Phrase O the Week increase. And thank you crazy Russian men who like to fix cars....how would we laugh without you? I dunno.

As Mayor of this town, I declare this day....(dramatic pause for effect) "Fun with Faces Day" (expression goes from happy to sad to blushing to angry to big happy face with sunglasses)

That is all.

So it's Christmas eve and what does Colleen's brain think? - "It don't feel like christmas"

I have never not felt so apathetic about christmas before, and i can't tell why, although it might be the developing cold i received this morning...jee I wonder who i got that from (cough) Merry (cough). But it's ok I won't hold a grudge (turns around and angrily mutters to self) ANYWAY...There must be an unbalance in the cosmos. Its been "cold" for a total of about 5 days this whole "winter." Mother nature is pullin a fast one on us. She's all...ha ha it's all warm n such, and we're all...whaaaaa? But i did see Die Hard for the first time today, i am very deprived in the classic movie section, for I am yet to see Braveheart. (many of you prob just went WHAT! or gasped/winced at the thought...but alas it is true) But we can cross Die Hard off the list now. And i must say i didn't watch it just cuz i hadn't seen it. There is a subplot here, I watched it to see my buddy Alan Rickman. He's so cool. I want to shake his hand.

-Your mission if you choose to accept it is to download the Drunken Christmas Carol that has been played on the radio station of Z100. Upon downloading it, listen to the masterful lyrics. Superb and Fantastically Fruity (just how i like my men). On behalf of the "drunken singer" I'd like to say: Merry Gimmas!

**Your computer will self destruct in Five, Four, Three, (run!) Two, (are you insane, still sitting there!) One...**

You didnt think I'd really have the ability to rig explosives to your computer now did you?

KA-BOOM!

Lots of creativity this week. 2 reinventions of well known songs, and one creation of a new magical character of sorts.

1st song was in Economics where we must fight to keep from going insane. Merry and I were getting quiet bored and as such started to say things to entertain ourselves. Upon realizing Mr.Spelmen was a true economist i said: Ya'll can't deny it, he's an economist.
(then mer chimed in) You don't wanna (noise of letter F) with him.

Then in Digital Media Jesse and I created the Sarcastic Dry Comment Fairy. She appears in an instant, says something like, "hey, thats a real nice shirt you got there." Then enthusiastically vanishes. Instead of been cheerful and saying nice things, she's sarcastic and saves all her energy for when she disappears.

And lastly on the way back from Senior Wills, there was a radio in there and the last song we heard was "little did she know she kissed a hero." So on the way to the car i think I changed the words and then Liz sang them with such grace..."Little did she know she kissed her poopsie." And that line awards her the Phrase O da Week. Congrats Liz.

Speakin o poopsie, i really dont have a definition for it. Its not poop and it's not sie...I really need to define it. Cuz right now it could be considered junk (the vaguest word in the english language)

For the honor of Ms.Hance (who may visit this very site tonight, if she can unlock the mystery of technology) I shall tell you about the ever exciting Magical Elves.

Did ya'll hear 'bout dem Magical Elves yet? Well, all you gots to do is find a picture of one (your best bet is to have a friend draw a picture, you can't draw your own, it doesnt work that way). So once you got yourself a picture, place it in front of you. Stare into the eyes for a moment (to capture the magic). Then you must WILL the elf off the paper. This procedure can become long and tedious if you don't know what you're doing. To will them out, think of Elf Land and the type of things your elf has, or would like to have. Each elf is different though, so if your friend gets his/hers to come out, dont try to cheat and do what they did. Once you guess right....POOF! Out he comes to grant all the wishes your lil heart desires.
(no gaurantee that you're eld won't turn evil. Life expectency: 6months-3yrs)

First and formost Alan Rickman rules (for those of you who don't know, hes an actor)

I am getting progressively lazy..
Yousay: You? Lazy?
I reply: I know! It's crazy
..Half way throught the week in which i am controlling my fate...my fate of waking up that is. My alarm clock is normally set for 6:15, BUT I denied the Gods and turned it to 6:21, as such, giving my more time to sleepy. Then, tuesday morning a sound went off indicating it was time to get up, this time at 6:21. Again, I rebelled, setting it for 6:30 I then re-engaged sleepy time. At this rate, by Friday I won't get to school on time. I defy you stars!!
Speakin o which, the remake of Romeo + Juliet is SUCH a great movie. The style, setting, colors, the raspberry flavored drink that Juliet complains about, cuz she'd rather any other flavor except that (rumors on the street is that she fancies cherry)

Quick shout out to Passions. Quality crap. Once you watch...well, nothing happens.

On behalf of "Our Family," I'd like to say we are all happy to hear about this lady who has wondered into Tony's life. You deserve it T-sac.

Now it's saturday and I wasn't home on Friday cuz I have a life (wink wink) but here is the phrase o the week. It's brought to all of y'all from the ancient talking turtle from The Never Ending Story. While discussing "the nothing" with Atreau (thats prob spelled wrong..but he's the worrier kid), he said:
--We don't care so much that we don't care.
Now thats a whole lot of Not caring going on.

I have so much junk to write and do this weekend, it's times like this when I wish I had a time machine so I could just skip ahead of doing all that work. That, and I have always wanted to jump in a time machine when i had 20 bucks in my pocket so when i arrived in the 1800s i would be the richest kid in town.

Man I want a time machine...

And now...

What do the rich folk do,
When they've lost a stock-share or two?
..eh screw it, it's too hard to write a song that matches the magic found in "What do the simple folk do?" \
Billy Joel dropped a coal in a stocking, Are you mocking..me? Pop pop fizz fizz oh what a relief it's not. For my stomach remains in a knot. Watch out for that Robot..it'll get ya. Apples are green, you know what I mean, Mr. Clean?
Monkey see, monkey do, monkey eats stew.
Yuck...stew.

Enough of that, back to stuff that makes sense, like airbound rocks, and exploding fish.

I decided to look up some words today...you know expand my vocabulary.

pantie/panty- pl.panties: a woman's or child's undergarment covering the lower trunk and made with closed crotch

pimp: a man who solicits clients for a prostitute

poop(1): an eclosed superstructure at the stern of a ship
poop(2): slang: information
**these definitions are SO wrong

monkey: a primate mammal other than man; one of the smaller, longer-tailed, and usually more arboreal primates as contrasted with the apes

flatulence: the release of gas from the body

booby- plu-boobies: an awkward ineffective person: dope

**Zee Poopsie** Thats right, you'll be seeing that in the yearbook, i'm getting my 16 cents worth.

Song o the week: Chinese Rappa's Delight-Tai Mai Shu

Take a glimpse, if you dare, into a misty conversation in the night.

Lactaid Lady: i wish i could be like Hamlet and pretend to be crazy
Cookies4Grandma: you can...
Cookies4Grandma: but i don't know where that would get you... your not seeking revenge on your uncle for killing your father
Lactaid Lady: rats!
Cookies4Grandma: i mean, unless there is something i don't konw about
(dun Dun DUN)

Are you starting to question my past? If i have any skeletons in my closet? If you shouldnt have eaten that (insert food product hea)?
--Ah hA! I thought so...For there is method to my madness, or is there?

I started the third Harry Potter book today. Let's see how long it takes to read dis one.

There are taxes on everything now a days, cept air...and poop. Can you imagine a poop tax? Every time you go to poop you have to pay a nickel, maybe more depending on the economy. And what happens to those who can't afford this tax, you ask? Well...it's a horrible way to die, Poop Implosion. The poop has no where else to go, like a wondering bum, so it simply explodes. Many don't know this but poop is actually explosive. When it's inside of your body for too long, it travels upward and once it hits some organs..BAM!! It seems harmless when it's outside of the body, because the air neutralizes it, but inside, its a time bomb. So if you can't afford to poop, you better pray they inforce an air tax first....

There is a product in the market known as the Monkey Bike, I am like "Wow!, I don't believe!"

AHH I have delays on this site like it's my job or something. Before I start I would like to tell all that Thursday, Dec 6, 2001 is a day that shall live in infamy forever in my life. IT was the greatest day o my life. I actually got to go on a braodway stage and preform a monologue. It was the greatest feeling in the world making all those people laugh. Without a doubt it's what I want to do for the rest of my life.

But back to business, I noticed Friday has passes and I left you all out in the cold with no Phrase O the Week. So here it comes now.
This week's phrase is from the ever so talented, Liz Rivalsi. There is no use in explaining it cuz it really makes no sense.
--(As she raises her hand and draws it across her face she says) "Ah, cancer. (Then goes to sleep)
Thank you Liz.

Everyone is getting a big box o Love for Xmas, for it is all i can afford. (insert sad face hea)

...Grandma has figured out how to use the internet..and she even has a site going. All hell is breaking loose!

I apologize for all who are close to me this week as I find myself not wanting to be around people at times so far this week, even my good friends. I don't know why. So i'm sorry if I come off "cold" I dont want to be. I'm starting to get annoyed at myself, cuz I'm aware of this "problem" but it seems I don't know how to get out of this mood. Maybe if I pet Zee Kitty, on Zee Place Mat I will feel Zee Better.

FightClub is the craziest movie ever. Pixies: Where's my mind?

I am deepy sorry for my lack of phrase o the week for y'all, I twas so busy chiz-illin wit my homes. But alas! no more excuses. I will make it up to you right now, by announcing an unpresidented event in the history of Kickin it Oldschool. I am giving you a triple Phrase o da week!!

Merry has not been given the honor of this but now gets two! Due to her hilarious week of crazy talk. The first came on Sunday, while discussing ghetto phrases where her mom didnt believe "holla!" was one of them. Her mom said guys at work told her new things and one of them was how pounding someone instead of high fiving, and Ms.Marie (her mom) held out her fist for mer and mer says:
--Mom, I will NOT pound you.

Then on Wed I went over there agian to say Happy B-Day to Ms.Marie, and Mer and I were watching it and i wouldnt give her the remote unless she took off her pants, but she wouldnt do it unless the world was watching. So I invited the world into her room and she said:
--But then i wont have any PANTS on!! (in some crazy accent)

The Last night Mr. Jesse Goldman was talkin to me about the SAT circles that you answer the questions with, he said the following:
--You have to fill then in full and black. Just like I'd like my women.

Personally I like my men, Fantasically Fruity...like ice pops.

Oh and I enjoy dancing to the Mad Phat Beats whenever possible, (makes vulgar hand motion)

Sorry for the lack O updates...it's Harry Potter's fault. He made me read (bites lip, trying to hold back the tears)...and see the movie. GASP

Oh the mystery of the rubber pencil and/or pen. A shake o the wrist and you can change its composition. I saw Tony do it the other day in economics, working his magic. I think people want to think its an optical illusion, they cant accept the fact that it really turns to rubber...trust me, i know. I bet if I was big and strong enough to pick up a car and shake it around, it would turn to rubber. I could become a superhero...rename myself the Rubber Bandit. I could have the ability to change everyday things to rubber. It would be very safe for the kiddies....can't hurt yo'self with rubber.

Alan Rickman as Professor Snape...amazing. (Harry Potter character, for those of you who dont know...::raises eyebrow::)

You know what my name means? Colleen: Definition-Girl. How undescriptive. I'm jealous of people whose names actually mean something which is like...oh let's see...everyone! My name should just be Blank. I'm empty. Well not empty...just you know, girl. Which is pretty ironic for me. Good job parents. I'm So not your typical girl, never have been. Played with Ninja Turtles (the heros in a half shell...turtle power!) instead of Barbies, always wear sneakers (that i steal from my friends..mu-haha), perfected the one handed fart noise-thanks cousin Adam and Eric, and I rate my burps...YEP, I'm a girl. (Sits back in the chair all proud-like)

And now like the rest of the nation I am caught in this Harry Potter deal. Started reading the book last night, read some in creative writing, and then for 2 hours when I got home. I've never been so into a book since Goosebumps...remember those. Hmm..I'm starting to question my reading level...

Writing college essays is a challenge to make fun. I try to make boring things into fun things so I want to do them. Right now this challenge is being heavily procrastinated. This Emerson one is killing me, "write about your history." I'm trying to creatively involve some life aspects, and achievements to make my life sound adventurous. Mayby I'll just pretend I am Indiana Jones on my way to the Temple of Doom. Talk about my trustly whip and ability to always pick up a fetchin young lady while fighting off possessed mummies. It's not as easy as it sounds so stop rolling your eyes. You think I like having to save people all the time, like I'm a superhero or something. I'm only human, and this world asks too much of me....so i declare upon this day, the 25th of November, my retirement from the Jones Family Business. (Guy is heard saying WHA?!)

-No Doubt: Tragic Kingdom. Such a good CD. It was reborn yesterday for a car ride, and now I want to listen to it but cannot, for it is inside of Merry's CD player. RATS!

Good ol' mom. It was her Bday on Wed the 21st, and what did she want you might ask...boring things. No offense to my mom but as people in general age their creativity seems to fade. Earings, stuff for the car, a deer whistle- i have NO idea what that is but it was on the list, shirts, turtleneck. Actually I dont think earings was even on the list this year. My dad is the same way though with this stuff-he just loves his turtlenecks. But as they get older (cough) 45 (cough) there desire for fun/non-boring things dies. I should get her some poopsie or maybe renew some AMAZING artwork I did in kindergarden of a rainbow and a sun. It's a challenge to make shoppin interesting year after year, it's wearing me out. I question if i have the stamina to continue...I'm alone on this, my brother is of NO help what so ever. But I will previal...i hope. (bites lip)

I'm out like an obese man after eating a thanksgiving meal

1st things 1st...Phrase O Da Week!!

This week it is brought to you by Heather Hadgeoff. While discussing a student in our school, who for dignity purposes will remain unknown, she said:
"She used to fart uncontrollably"
--the opposite of controlled farting.

Now back to the usual business...

Time is crazy thing. Techniquely it's always constant. Each second measured, but you can't base everything on an exact science like that. Time can take forever when it wants to; like when you're running late, you have this drawn out time where nothing gets accomplished. Yet, other times you are early and you waste time just waiting. So I have come to the conclusion that time is a human entity in the way it goes along in a daily routine. Most of the ..time..(laughs at self because I'm writing about time so its funny to use it in that sentence..) Anyway, it usually runs fine but there are points where it is behind or ahead of schedual. Maybe when a week seems to be crawling along..its because time hurt itself playin ultimate frizbee, or it has the cold, or is depressed b/c time is alone. There is no other TIME, just one. One lone soul. So don't get mad at the clock, it's only human. Hate the game, not the playa.

tra

Let's discuss a compound word. Cornbread. Corn. Bread. Corn- a food source which is consistantly yellow, with options on comsumption: Choose between its natural creation of a cob or the individual pixels removed. Then we have Bread: Composed of yeast, with a sponge like appearance. Comes in assorted variations. I.E.-Wheat, Rye, White, Potato, Raisin, etc. Options of toasting come with it as well. It's commonly used when constructing a "sandwich." When you combine both these substances you get a magnificent carbon based meal. A delight for the tummy. Oh so yummy. In the words of Chris Rock- "Aint nothing wrong wit dat!"

Recent polls show the following:
IN: When Mother Nature makes sense
OUT: When Mother Nature is drunk and the weather goes all over da place

IN: Da poopsie
OUT: pee pee

IN: Writing notes to yourself
OUT: Getting a note from someone

Word Big Bird. Big bird. He was yella, like this fella I once knew, who, lived in a shoe. It was brown and he would always flush it down. Down a river. There's a fiber, he lies, he flies...he dies. And thus is life. Don't be a knife they are too sharp so play a harp in the orchestra. Music is key, don't get stung by that bee, for he, is the King and here's the thing...the royalty will not save thee from the fires of hell. So very well, ring my bell, and I will come a-runnin'. Ain't that som'em?

Funny ting I heard: Guys are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken and the rest are handicaped.
--its funny...cuz it's true.

They want a 70 dollar deposit for the yearbook, then i get to pay at least another 20 afterwards. This book better be made of gold and have diamonds in it. Diamonds not Qubitz Zorconia or however its spelled. It better freakin glow in the dark and be able to fly. What do they need all this money for? Drugs I bet, the teachers want to get high at the end of the year, and get high with the good stuff. But i mean cmon its a book with pictures..of students, not naked celebrities. I dont even think our class ring was that much. This book better extend my life expectancy at least 10 years. I wonder if I could just pay 30 bucks for the pages I actually want. I dont need a picture of ALL the people in this school. There are freakin 1028 kids in our class alone. Its almost impossible to know everyone of them...unless your jesus or something.

Monkeys are funny animals, ask around.

This was just too good not to make it the Phrase O the Holy Day (holy day being sunday cuz o the church thing). There usually is only a Phrase O the Week, but as I said this was just too good. It's a line from SNL, the martha stewart sketch.

::That gives me a HUGE Martha-Boner::
-It's so wrong, but so funny

Word to your Mom.

He was the sweetest of children. Always helpin' his mama he was. Oooh child, if you'd a seen his face you'd think youz was lookin at an angel. But we all know, all the angels stay in heaven. So dat made him one of those fallen angels. He ran away from home when he was only all of 7 years. Carried a big ol' suitcase down yonder (points down yonder, aka down the road). No one did stop him, cept that UPS truck. Smacked his brains clear 'cross the road it did. I didnt shed a tear though. I never did like that boy.
-This contradicting rant is brought to you by old people...
Old People, when they get senial, put them in a home.

It's Friday everyone and we all know what that means...Phrase O the week time!! (various shouts from the studio audience)
This week's phrase is from Liz, Liz Rival*i...can you figure out who that is?
The phrase was said in regards to the Food Drive, while looking at my "Fancy Sliced Carrots" can she said, in a southern accent:
--Be careful wit dem cans! (implying the importance of it being "fancy")

I would like to take the honor of renaming homeless people to a more appropriate name: Lazy Folk. They have really gotten on my nerves recently. Usually I am fond of them but when it comes to the holiday season, they just piss me off. Is it really that hard to get a job? NO, they are just too lazy so they depend on people who work hard for the money and leach off them through the power of guilt. (mocking voice) Oh i'm soo hungry. Give me money for food. Oh you want money? Then dance and sing for me, dont just be annoying, be creative, use your brain. You know they look forward to thanksgiving time cuz they get lots of food and arent greatful, they just expect it. They use us year after year, those smooth criminals. Damn them all..(until the summer time)

POOP!

I wish I could just think of food and it would appear, like Peter Pan and the lost boys did in Never Never Land. But instead of that crazy food that was colored weird and such, it would be like chicken, cake, ice-cream, peanut butter M&Ms, soup, and what have you. To top it off, that stuff could be healthy for you! That would be the greatest and it would solve world hunger. I'm a genius! I cant wait to go to Never Never Land this year! (thinks of happy things to fly but realizes that there is no fairy dust on me) RATS!

School is a lot of fun when you dont go to the 1st 4 periods...thank you drama!

Check out Incubus - Warning, the only versions so far are live but it's a great new song.

extreme change of pace for me today but i want to post this anyway, cuz my emotions have been all over this week.

Blurry Vision

Why do I do the things I do?
Is it me?
You?
The World?
I'm under the microscope
of my own eye
What's my motive?
These atoms of insecurities fly around
Faster and faster
Until they collide
in and explosion of tears.
And like so many things in life
I dont know why

Look around,
Everyone wages their own battles
but you never see the white flags
We're all actors
Glass characters
pretending to be made of metal.

Note to self : Dont ever play football again.

I cant believe the level of soreness i am experiencing right about now. Oochy ouchy! It even hurts when I lay down to rest, I feel like i have arthritis. So not fun.

Today is Sunday, Nov. 11th. That means Priemere night for Fox. I look forward to Simpsons, Malcom in da mid., and X files. Its sad to me that XF is getting bad press for this year, it was such a great show. I will be very sad if I will have to say, "it USED to be good." But i'll watch nevertheless, cuz I love Gillian. I know her by a 1st name basis.

Bless us all...every one! -Tiny Tim

Now the moment you have all been waiting for...The conclusion of Mary, the scratchy throat goblin.


Ding Dong "Mary" is dead! Vitamin C finally decided to show up and kicked it oldschool of her. About time, there was a moment when I felt doomed to forever have this illness invading my throat. But alas, NEVERMORE! It was only for like a fragment of a second that I thought otherwise, cuz i mean i dont question the awesome power of Vit. C, only fools do that.

Speakin of Fools, good song: Loverfools by The Cardigans

Phrase O the Week: Its brought to you by me, call me what you will this is MY website afterall, so GET OFF MY BACK! Anyhoo...
(as I hug my notebook I comment)_It's DELIGHTful.

Big Event for me- I got picked to do a one min. monologue on a broadway stage for when my Oral Communications class goes to see Rent. I am so excited. Seeing that being on stage is something I want to make my career out of, its a big deal and really cool experience for me. Can't wait for Dec 6 to hit.

And so last weeks Saga continues...

This Vitamin C super hero pill is taking a long time to form. I fear becoming too dependent on this Vit. C and actually being defeated, its crazy i know. I refuse to lose, that would be just plain wrong. I will not let this "Mary" ruin me!! She's going down, she's going down BIG TIME. I'll find her when she's sitting at the kitchen table reading the comics on a Sunday morning. Then I'll grab her by the throat and tell her she's got 2 choices. Either Shimmy, or DIE (dun Dun DUN). And because Mary cant shimmy, being a scratchy throat goblin and all, she WILL die. Mu-ha-ha (fades to black)

Mary still raves havoc in my throat region. She will be defeated as Harry was. Vitamin C will soon collect enough energy to form a Mary Ass Kicking Entity. (envisions giant circular Vit. C tablet with golden glow). The name of this hero...(dramatic pause) Vitamin C-its not very creative, but what exactly did you expect from a pill. They arent what you'd call "honors material."

Lately I feel like dancing, not your usual shimmy, but an all out dance. Shake my groove thang, and get some fries to go with it.

The doors of opportunities are wide open, hopefully i wont hesitate to walk through them.

This is what I would call and older article from the Colleen Times, old but still good.

I think "Harry," the devil who made his home in my stomache but was kicked out, has sent a friend to "chill" in my throat. I've been popping vitamin C like its my job so there is NO way I can be getting sick. So once again Harry strikes, only this time it's one of his friends- "Mary." Poor Harry has resorted to giving me a scratchy throat throught the power of Mary, the scratchy throat goblin for those who dont know her. Harry is just crossing the line now. I mean, I actually know he's responsible for the wave of hang ups plaguing the phone, I have caller ID. So now I must devise a plan to defeat this goblin. I'm alittle rusty in the goblinology so i might have to seek advice, but either way..Mary is going down...WAY down.

As for the mus-ak: It's official, I'm obsessed with Coldplay. I searched for new songs today and found 4 great songs. Man they are SO great its amazing. If you want to check out the newst songs they are; Animals, No more keeping my feet on the ground (a long title but its really good so dont discrimminate), For you, and Only Superstition.

In the latest news: The "less fortunate" are becoming a big pain in the arse. At the rate I'm going with all these food drives in every Fing class, i'll be at a soup kitchen for thanksgiving. (shakes fist)

Why is "Cup Noodles" called that? Why not Cup O Noodles. Were they that lazy that they couldnt even slip an "o" between the name. Or maybe the company is too far in debt so they cant afford more ink to print out an "o". Maybe they could hire some elves to write an "o" between the words, under pay them, give em no insurance, beat them, make em cry. Elves are good for that kind work, and they dont complain..well, to your face anyway, cuz they gots no wherez else to go. Santa is laying off a lot of workers..and elves got to feed themselves.
But anyway, without the "o," Cup Noodles is like a fragment of a sentence...if cup noodles WAS a sentence that is. But a sentence needs a verb and all...WOW I'm a HUGE nerd.

Coldplay is my love

How come magna doodles always have dents in them? It doesnt matter how many times you try and erase it, it's there FOR-EV-ER!! You'd think they would perfect that, with all the money that flows into the magna doodle funds (looks away). But i mean is it really that hard to make a stronger cover, it is made for kids, they destroy things like its there job. But it's not their job, well it shouldnt be, that's child labor and we all know how wrong that is. Back to the whole toy thing, I never want to take my kid to Toys R Us until they are about 20 yrs old. It might sound liek i'd be a nazi as a parent, but think about it. Every parent goes there with good intentions of getting ONE toy (like that EVER happens) and they leave with their child kicking and screaming. Then comes the glances from the other people in the store mummbling under there breath that you are a child abuser. You just cant win.

I am aware that it is friday and this weeks Phrase O the week goes to Kristin Macrosin(i totally did not spell her last name right, or probably the 1st for that matter) Only a select drama ppl will get this:
You're smoking a JOINT in MY CLASS?!!---you had to be there

As for Drama...plays is this weekend so go see MAKIN IT today or Sat. its at 8 and its 8 bucks. Just watch for the detention kids cuz we are so funny i must say.

Wow lookin back on last weeks posts...i had nothing to talk about cept the new format, i apologize for such boring CRAP. I gots a whole bunch o new stuff now.

Very busy weekend, one thing I had to do on Sat was take the ACT. Nice and early. I think it's moments like those when having a clone would be beneficial, a person who by every physical appearance IS you. But, for this other you to help take tests in your place, you'll need to tell, for argument sake we'll call this "other you," Sam. Tell Sam everyone studies all the time so they can survive. The people who dont get will inevitably get eaten by dinosaurs....You are guaranteed that studing is ALL Sam will do. However, in case you get stuck with a bad clone, if its defective use it as a bookself.

Guess what kids?! Its Friday..and we all know what that means. (crowd gets all into it and shouts the following: PHRASE O THE WEEK!)

This week's phrase is brought to you by the narrating ability of Danielle O'leary. Backround info: While watching a cheesy movie in eco about supply and demand they talked about a drought in america during the 70s or something, people were trying to consurve water and they showed a sign which read:
If it's yellow, leave it mellow.
If it's brown, flush it down.

Its a good motto.

Shout outs to..: Danielle- Look, he's REALLY there! (obviously the man is standing in front of a blue screen)
LIZ- Mmmmmm...

There might be a shortage of funny this weekend, as the Big Cheese aka Me, has mucho junk to do. (whatever could junk mean in that sentence?)

i tink i will actually stay with dis format. (applause at the fact that i made up my mind..Hurray)

After the dwarfs had realized their numbers had decreased from 54 to 7...they started to suspect Hungry...or as some like to call him, Hungy.

Ok so i'm fickle and changed my mind about 100 times with this new webpage setting...it happens. BACK OFF!!! (goes over and awkwardly smacks yo mouth, thus, knocking your teeth out like CHICKLETS!)....damn

ok so i saw the fire one and was like....this is to hard to read, BE GONE! And with a poof it was and now there is this sphere O fun as i like to call it, in its place. You like, you buy.

yeah new site page deal...do you like the fire? I dunno if i want to stay with this one or go with a robot type one...Gemme some feedback.

Last week i realized how bad commericals occur. Sometimes they purposely make them stupid, so you remember it, but thats nothing new. Here's what i figured out...they (the advertising ppl) sit around a table for who knows how long, throwing out any idea and by the time they think of anything halfway decent, they think its great cuz their brains are so tired and in actuality its horrible. Kinda like "The Chicken Man" from the McDonalds commericals. You know the big boss guy (thats there titles now, not CEO) knew it was bad but made it anyway. You know why? Cuz you dont want depressed employees, especially after they get fired cuz then they do crazy tings like jump out windows or eat their poo. You have to keep them 'round for their well being. Thus, bad commericals happen b/c of kind-hearted big boss guy's, bless them. Now instead of bitchin about those wasted seconds of your life (like i do) we should embrace them. For it keeps those poor souls in advertising alive.

BLAH!
that is all...

Getting old is a lot like being a baby. You cant walk, you wear diapers, lose teeth and eat soft food, people talk funny to you, you have a distinct odor. Have you ever noticed that? There is the baby smell and old ppl smell, there isnt any teenage smell, or mid-30s smell...(Jerry Seinfeld voice) Whats the deal with that? Anyway...I worry about getting old, being all of 17 already i think i should. But on a sad and serious note, most old ppl are rejected by society, the butt of jokes, always accused of farting. Society wants nothing to do with you and you're placed in a home, just tossed aside like an out of date toy. It's so sad and lonely, especially if you out live your friends or spouse. That's why there are so many crazy old ppl--they snapped. Most ladies give up on people and turn to cats, getting as many as humanly possible. Others turn mean and watch kids through the curtains, and steal all the "young-ins" toys that land in their yard. There there is a small population of cool old people who seem to be forever young in spirit. I want to be one of those.

A funny/crazy ting i did today: Kissed Tony on the cheek as he went to leave school just to see his reaction and the others in the group.

Dont you hate those 2-5 min periods that you get nothing accomplished...but not by choice. Lots of times it happens when you are waiting, either for something or someone. It happens in school all the time! You sit there in those O so comfy seats waiting for the bell to ring. Instead of taking that energy and time, and applying it to something productive like dodge ball, or shimmying, eating, doing a circus act, makin puddin'...you are left just waiting. Fixing your eyes upon some random object. For instance, a pencil sharpener, wondering if it gets used and how much. The extremes of desperation to keep my mind awake cause me to take that thought further and ask if the pencil sharpener hates pens cuz they think they are so tough not needin to be sharpened and all....has the pencil sharpener ever sharpened an innocent pen out of anger?
A lot of times I sit and over hear convos...or fake interest in one. I mostly try to put that time to good use, make some faces when no one is looking and laugh at myself. Hey, at least I am working on the abs...

Song thats good for dancy dancy: Peaches by Presidents of USA

Phrase O the week goes to..(drum roll please)
LIZ! : Now I'm Impotent.

For all those guys that dont know..being impotent is HOT! More on that later.

Micheal Jackson is back, "You Rock My World" is fun to sing to...watchin him dance and such in the video.

Dont you wish that you could choose what was to happen, not only while watching tv but in life? Kinda like those books where you decide what you want to happen next and depending on what you choose there are different endings. When i was watching the yankee playoffs with Dan, I thought it would be amusing to choose what they did at bat. I wanted someone to just throw away their bat and kick the ball..all out kick. I think they would need a special metal strip on their shoe so they dont break their foot, but thats another story. But in life it would be funny if time stopped and you got to choose what was to happen. Maybe you want someone to implode, or for it to rain candy, or a big nice purple monster to hold your hand as you skip threw a meadow. Who knows. You could do whatever your lil heart desired. There would probably be a raffle, so that way everyone has a chance to win a shot at pickin what you'd like to see happen. Maximum chance of winning is 3, any more than that is unfair.
I wonder how such a system would work?....
(lifts hand to chin as I go into a deep ponderin')

Song O the Day: Bye bye Miss American Pie, the punk cover by Catch 22-performed by Jesse and the Airguitars. The fake instruments, the screaming fans, the security guards...the pep rally.

Last week a crazy ting occured to me. While coming back from the bathroom a kid from my class was coming back from the School Store. We entered the hallway going back to class at the same time. Him on the left and I on the right. In my mind I thought of a situation like you'd see on Seinfeld.
Situation (with sang. hand motions):

As we round the corner we casually glance at one another. Then, upon realization that we're from the same class, we do a double take. What makes it intense is that fact that me and this other kid are rivals, cuz he always beats me back to class. So I, in sheer determination, want to come out victorious in this battle. I act on this, and start to walk faster and faster until the both of us 'splode into an all out mad dash for the classroom. But I pull it out and win at the end, cuz well...this happens in MY head so I'm not about to let myself lose. Plus, what kinda ending is that?

Noise O the Day: Different variations of farts.

Activity O the Day that goes along with Noise O the day: Throwing farts across the room as a type of fart grinade.

Tink 'bout dis...

No one really eats coleslaw. This food product is constantly dissed. It always comes with some kind of meal at a diner that is ranked above it. Its the peasant, never eaten no matter how hungy you are. Pushed to the side away from the main course. It has no taste though, its like the solid form of water. I wonder if it needs anti-depressant to get over the void of loneliness. The saddest of all food products. Its really not its fault, it's bad placement. Here in the US there are just too many better things to choose from, too much of a variety that coleslaw is left behind in the dust. If we open up an over seas market to the 3rd world countries...oh man. Coleslaw would be like chicken...it would be EVERYWHERE, the coolest food around. It will be a voluntary exchange as an economist(is that even a word?) would say b/c the people there would accept coleslaw while saying bye bye to starvation. (draws a demand curve for it)

Gotta see: Tempation Island 2 (coming soon to Fox)...Yeah trash tv!

Now this is a dumb question BUT have you ever wanted to fly? Of course. But i think if you were to come upon a genie and asked to fly, he/she has probably heard that one SO many times that they want to turn your excitement into sorrow....evil genies are everywhere. So you ask to fly and BAMB! you are turned into a bird. And as if being a bird wasnt bad enough... (I'll mention bad things: Cant talk to friends, you are covered in feathers, you get shot at by some punk kids with bebe guns)..The genie decides to put you in a cage in a petshop. CRUEL IRONY! You're given the ability to fly but cant utilize it. All because the genie is bitter that on one makes their dreams come true. Those poor tortured souls.
P.S.- If you're an evil genie like that..Cmon dude...thats so not cool

Great Musician- Sheryl Crow...I LOVE her!

Youz been P.P.D.ed!!

Just last week, during drama, Jesse said something profound. When he was younger he was convinced that the weather man on the news actually controlled the weather. He thought his office was in the clouds and everyday the weather man would go into the elevator with his briefcase full of weather type knowledge. Now who knows if Jesse just imagined that OR he was shown a vision on the truth. No one really knows what it's like to be a weather man. The only weather men you know are from tv. Its an uncommon job. So they are like fairy tales. Drifting into the news station, telling us what is to happen in the sky. How would they know this without actually working with the clouds, asking them what's gonna happen. So props to Jesse for uncovering the truth.

Good Song: Vivrant thing by Q-Tip. It be a mad phat beat

And now i need a shower, cuz there is a nasty stank in the air.

I'm alittle late for phrase O the week...but here it is:

"I want to puh-hunch you in da face" its my own creation.

Crazy ting goes to Danielle for the random punchin and shootin (with the hands) in Starbucks friday night. Congrats, i'm sure you're family is proud.

I'm out like a fat kid in dodge ball

Viva Las Vegas. Thats all i got. The translation for all those who dont know espanol is : Las Vegas Lives. Crazy spanish.

now i would really like to share with all of yall a lil som'em i wrote up the other day. Its actually a serious poem, total change there from the usual topics. But here we go (buckle your seatbelts)

Starlight

A piece of the Heavens,
is found in starlight.
Sparkling dust suspended in the sky
An unattainable beauty
Each star tells a story
Visual history,
a billion years in the making
Guiding the lost
Granting wishes
The light fascinates
Prompting the imagination
Do souls live there,
emiting the glow?
A shining strength
A beacon in the night
Determined to be seen,
by those who seek it.

And now..Colleen's Words O Wisdom:

Imagine there was a society of little people, much like our own..but smaller. Naturally, we would hate each other just cuz of the height differences. There wouldnt really be any major destruction by them. It would just be annoying. They would throw little things at us, like pebbles and mini paper air planes. Occastionally they would knock over your glass and leave little hate notes around, but you cant really read it cuz the writing is so small. We would have to warn them to NOT mess with us cuz we could easily destroy their way of life. But in their arrogant ways (due to the small size of their brain, thus decreasing there ability to understand) they would push aside our words. Most people would carry around water guns with them to squirt them with water. They wouldnt realize it was simply water so they would run in fear yelling "eww Big People liquid!"
Yet one fine day (cue the song) all the fights will cease. A giant among the littles (not really a giant, just figuratively speaking) will unite the impossible of cultures. Teaching the littles and Bigs to co-exist. His name.....Lil' BoodHA. God bless him.

Footnote: After a century of peace among the society's, it all falls apart and they are sent back into war with each other after the President for the Littles gives the President for the Bigs the hand and tells him to (and i quote)"Dont go there girlfriend, I will knock your teeth out like chicklets." He then proceeded to reach into his pocket for some gum but the President of the Big's securtity thought he was pullin a gun so they shot him....476 times.

Tink bout dis: "Adults are just children with more money." - Kenneth Branaugh

Song O da Day: Love Rollercoaster by those good ol Red Hot Chili Peppers

Hey kids, its time to get updated again. Since i was absent for 3 days, we are behind on our work. Tisk tisk

Dont you hate it when you have to pee. No one else really cares about it cuz its not their problem. I just "emptied the tank" as i like to say, but the memory of the swollen bladder is still fresh in my mind. So if someone was to come up to me for some reason & say that they have to pee I would most likely have a mini flashback, and my response would be "that sucks"
You are SO blinded by the urine that its all you think about and suddenly you start to map out the quickest way to the bathroom. Then you think how this would never happen in the confines of your own home, because you can easily access one at any time at home. And even if you leave class to pee, the walk there takes forever. You're all anxious. The suspense builds as you go into the stall then.....you panic cuz you cant seem to "relieve yourself" since you held it in for so long and you wonder if the rest of your life you will not be able to pee then...(tinkle, tinkle) and its the most glorious sound. You feel like a million bucks when you step out. To top it off you stroll back to class singing/whistling. Well...I do anyway.

Song O the Day: Cant touch this-MC Hammer (i wonder what ever happened to him..hes got to be homeless now)

Oh b4 mer gets all....you know...tired and hungie(shes just waiting to die, crazy grandma right danielle?)

Phrase of Last week goes to Merry: Thats getting kicked in the junk, JUNK!

Phrases only people from camp will get:

1) I need some chocoleets! (smacks bum 3 times)

2) Did you glue my buttcheeks together?.....Suddenly your Mr.Observant

3) It's funny.....cuz it happened

4) Gay grandmas read this...Gay grandmas who eat their own poo read this ( i lean back sensing victory when BAM, ive been had my poison cookie makin grandma..)

Some Memorable Tings

1) Getting the WHOLE KITCHEN thrown at me..thanks Katie (psycho!)
2) Ass Jumpin...oh the bruises
3) Lemar pokin Ken in the tummy
4) When we all jumped Katie
5) Freezing to death at night
6) Not showering for 2 days....YEAH!!

Fun times all 'round..you guys better make a trip next time so you can witness it for yourselves

Sorry there was no dose of funny yesterday, the site decided to be junk again and not let me update.
But i'll give ya some great stuff today to make up for it

Lets not forget about the impending danger of being hit by an ansteroid. Not like an asteroid hitting earth, thats juibba jabba, i'm talkin about getting hit in the head. And impact zone on your skull. You're walkin down the street mindin your own biz when BAM! you're been hit upstyle by a rock from outer space. And there is really no insurance for it. Its the luck of the draw. And there is usually a high rate of death if the rock is big. Not all of them burn up in the atmosphere. We need a defense system, like an umbrella hat..cept its made of metal. The majority of people are hit in the head so that makes sense. Or it could be major Junk and just be an umbrella hat covered by tin foil but make it look all medal n such in the infomercials. Get some cheesy actors in there (* inside note:danielle gets excited over the use of cheesy). I can see it now (you enter my mind)
::Guy walkin down the street::
--Announcer: Has this ever happened to you or someone you know?
::Suddenly asteroid comes out of NO WHERE, hits directly, there is a Boom and cloud of smoke. All thats left is a pile o ashes. We hear a voice say: What the..::
--Announcer: Say goodbye to sudden death and hello to Anti-Asteroid Iniolation (Show hat rotatin 'round like its nobody's business thru use of special effects or string, depends on budget)
::Show another guy jogging along and wearing hat, asteroid comes at him all mad, it hits the hat and falls to the ground. Guy continues to live, turns to camera, thumbs up: Thank you Anti-Asteroid Iniolation!

*Tot ser quote- "Keep your words nice and sweet. You may have to eat them someday."-Anon.

*Wise words from Conan, O'Brien that is: "If you laugh at yourself loud and hard everytime you fall, people will think you're drunk."

Great songs at the moment: Coldplay-Everythings Not Lost, Spies.....Wyclef-Gone til November......Weezer- Photograph

Site to check out that will make you laugh while I'm away.. T'inator (it changes any website into the language of Mr.T..FOO!) And as I just stated I will be away for the weekend, going upstate. You got the house to yourself, No parties!

This is from yesterday..

10/1/01...Check out that date. Its like binary code. I hope the govt doesnt come after me b/c I made this revelation. I'll have to watch my back. I dont see any objects like trees or garbage cans following me around. But this could be a new top secret, very hush hush, operation. My pen could be bugged...(eyes down pen. Rips it apart...finds nothing. resembles it.) well no bug in the pen. They could have taken over all the cameras in the school. So I'll have to turn invisible in the halls. Or hide in the mass of people.
I cant get caught. I'm like a secret biological weapon of crazy tings. They'll probably clone me and make an army. Then send a whole lot of "Me's" to Afganistan. Then the whole world will catch on fire from the insanity. And the anti-violence "Me's" (who pretended to be killin machines while being trained) will revolt. They'll try and talk the evil "Me's" into not killin, but thats all they know so it might take awhile. Geez, I hope I dont get found. All hell will break loose.

Scuba Steve suggests changing the spelling of "Junk" to "JunCK"...it will go into consideration.
Note: Scuba Steve=my dad

Random thoughts:

Funny word: 'Splode

My mom said "oh snap" yesterday. I think i'm a bad influence on her.

We need a cure for the common cold. I dont have one yet (knock on wood) but
i mean cmon, those scientists have had no luck with cancer and they have
worked on that for what? 10 yrs. enough of that business. We need to find
a cure for the cold, get some money flowing there. Not everyone gets cancer.
(i apologize for that last statement if i offended anyone. I think i
offended myself cuz i am mumbling "thats horrible")

Wouldnt it be funny if someone with no soul yelled obsentities at old
people. But the old people would have to be either senile or cant hear, so
that way they would forget what just happened or not hear it. (that one was
mainly for liz, she knows what i'm talkin about)

Now get your DAMN hands up! - brought to you by H to the izzle.

New Phrase: Thats JUNK! (this site was absolute junk yesterday when it wouldnt let me update)

And on that note i'll bit you adue..(that CANT be spelled right)

Song O the Day: Bang Bang by Dispatch

I dont really have a story for y'all today but i do need to say a few things that are directed at some people i know. I am not trying to be a bitch, i'm just being honest.

IN: Hanging out with your friends.
OUT: Being all over your "significant other" while all your friends are in the room

IN: Going to your friends house
OUT: Making your friends feel like your using them for their house

IN: Being considerant of others
OUT: Caring only about yourself

IN: Having a clue
OUT: Being mentally incompetent

Needed to vent alittle bit there. They are good rules for life I think. Thanks for you time.

Oh dont worry i didnt forget about the stories you have all come to read and love...

So this morning I was thinking about Mr.T, and I started to discuss this with Merry, Danielle, and Dan. If Mr.T was to be made a Saint, which I'm sure he will, what would we call him? Saint T or Saint Mr.T. Personally I feel Saint Mr.T is too long. Plus if someone slurs their words together it sounds like they are saying Saint Mystery. Thats a whole other can of worms. Saint T is pretty cool. However, Merry raised an interesting point, he could just remain Mr.T because Mother Theresa just left her name. But then there would have to be a footnote with the name somewhere because society isnt smart enough to know that Mr.T is a saint, half the people probably have no clue what a saint is.
So i figure the best way for Mr.T aka Saint T to get the word out is to issue a trading card. He can use background graphics of gold chains, insert his picture, and write the following:
Saint Name: Mr.T
Holy Statement: I pity da foo dat dont know I'm a Saint!
Hobbies: Cuttin' out the Jibba Jabba, and using my head by calling collect.

There can be a whole edition of Saint Trading Cards....I could make millions...or fail and wind up (eyes light up at realization) HOMELESS. SCORE! I knew there was a way!

Its friday kids that means its time for the phrase of the week

This week its brought to you by an inside joke with me and liz that we told mostly everyone about.

Lisp Girl: Jshesush, you guysh SHUCK. I'm sho thirshty, pleashe, pleash. I need shomething to drink
(makes random lisp noise)

The following is another lil something from Creative Writing. You're all caught up now once you read this. So get to it..

9/26
Yesterday while talking to the ever so cool Notorious L-I-Z, I had a revelation. The fact just hit me. Grandmas are internet masters. But it doesnt stop there, they are sages in the computer field. Always know how to operate it (turning on and off), easily check their email, IM their friends, and always know how to fix any problem. Liz told me they taught her everything she knows. The statement was evident to me when both of us suffered internet failure yesterday around 4:00. While I tried to restart the computer and check to see if the connection was there, good ol' Liz just constantly tried to sign on hitting "Connect" about 10 times. Guess who got online 1st.....Liz. She was taught by a master greater than mine, on the mount Grand Ma Ma. Stupid me went to Nepal, they taught me JACK. All we did was meditate and talk about Buddha.
BORING!!

Parent saying of the week: (chuckling) Of course I dont give you money. You're not even my kid. You're adopted..

Yo Auhncaehr. Auhncaehr bout nut-in. Aint nev gon care. Although not caring has its disadvantages. For instance, if I were to fill out a servey entitled "All about me," you can guess what every answer would be. I'm not good with conversation, it's more like a guaranteed argument if you approach me. I'm actually very boring, but auhncaehr. I should prob find something to care about. I am kinda partial to food, kitties (NOT cats), and toothbrushes. But that's it. I dunno what kinda career I can establish myself in that involves those 3 things. Auhncaehr though, I could be a garbage man for all I care. But AUHNCAEHR! (mumbles to self about not caring)

IN: getting days off from school via Jewish Holidays
OUT: Getting homework Senor year....can you say Senoritis?

Hey Everybody. Ok i have a new addition from the good old creative writing. I'm so glad i write things to amuse myself in that class while everyone writes about their day. Cuz when i get bored, i go thru some of the crazy tings i write about and laugh. Oh the humor..

9/24/01

I think instead of going to college I should be a bum. I could be my own boss that way. Determine what ally to live in, what box to sleep in, what garbage to eat, what obsenities (spelling on that?) to yell, which sweatpants to wear, which rock I will make my pet cat. The possibilies are endless. That way I dont have to go through all the stress of surviving college, that's too complicated. Now I can just focus on trying to survive all together. I'll probably have to be disowned, which means I'll have to let my parents find me high in the house. I could get drugs from just about anyone is school. My rents will see me chillin' in the den (like a villan of course, cuz there aint no other way to chill). The room will be filled with smoke, which is actually steam cuz i dont really want to get high and my parents wont know the difference. Then they'll be all, "Youz disowned" and I'll be all, "oh snap."
Or maybe I'll just join the circus. That disowned biz is a lot of work. There must be an easier way to become homeless...
(ponders)

Song of the day: Secret Agent Man, Austin Powers soundtrack as well as many other spy movies

And now, the closure to the Harry episode
::Wayne's World Flashback::

My plot worked! I knew it would. It was just too good. However, the threat still remains. Demons dont just leave and never come back, ESPECIALLY after being tricked. I got to make sure I dont fall asleep with my mouth open, because then he'll sneek back in. I could install a security system to keep him out. Or maybe, if I dont have the budget for that I could get a lock or the club. Put that bad boy on my mouth and no one will get in...
uh oh. There is a familiar pain like feeling in my tummy. Could it be? (time turns into slow motion for dramatic effect) NOOOO! (burps) Oh it was just a gas bubble. No worries. Aint no Harry 'round hea.

Now that was a short one so i'll add another lil short one. My brother wants to go online cuz he "told his friends he'd be on" and i was like you mean your girlfriend and he had no comment (his gf being some chick with the SN of Sugarbabies68). He met her online, appearently she goes to longwood. He's only 12 so i hope hes not typin bad things with this chica. Anyone finds out info..Email me at cooleen8@hotmail.com
Back to the funny

Another flashback. (walks over to the time machine and puts 9/17/01 as the date, presses start)

9/17/01
One day of school and then a holiday (cue song "Holiday" by Modonna). Two whole days off. Its a regular weekend. So I'm 'appy about that. Although we were supposed to be able to leave the DAMN school today but since I go to sachem....I shoulda seen this coming. Closed campus=suck. Freakin kids all over the place, cant walk. They are all 16-18yrs old and NO ONE knows how to walk. It blows my mind. It must be too complex for the majority of the students. I wonder if they have the same problem at Harvard. Them peoples be smart so I reckon they dont.
DE END

And now the moment you are all waiting for. Let the suspense end.

Ladies and gentlemen, the conclusion of the story of Harry.

9/10/01
I think I figured out how to defeat Harry. I have devised a plan. He seems to get happy when I feed him. But that just keeps him happy..it doesnt get rid of him. So I figure I'll back a cake and talk about how good it's going to taste really loud so he hears me. I'll taunt him in a way. When the smell gets to his area, he'll want to jump out and eat it. I'll just sit next to the cake, taking deep breaths so the smell can get to him fast. Then I'll say "Oh too bad I'm on a diet and can't eat this,"(loud once again to make sure he hears me). He'll go crazy from the smell and jump out of my throat to eat the cake. Hopefully it wont hurt. Then, while he's distracted by this wonderful cake I'll rig up a fishing net, connect it to the wall near by (where I'll be standing) and then light a candle under the rope to burn through it. When it burns through in about 5 mins the net will fall and I will jump up and down clapping while I laugh at Harry. And then the most glorious thing will occur. The timer on the stereo will go off to "hit the road Jack." Harry will sense his defeat, hang his head in shame, and leave. It's flawless...

There is one last entry left to this saga. A conclusion of sorts. Join me tomorrow, same time, same place, as I kick it Oldschool.

Yes this is the third post of the day. I am so excited that it is actually showing up.
I figure that the other one didn't show up because it was called "kickin it Newschool," and
nothing is better than Kickin it Oldschool. What was i thinking?

OK so i would now like you all to take a gander at a little something i wrote in my creative writing
journal. It was the first day of school. ::FLASKBACK::

9/7/01
So I must have an evil demon in my stomach. Well not really my stomach, alittle above it. It's got to be an evil demon, not like there are good demons. But I mean, what else could it be? It started ever since school started, thus leaving me to conclude that school is hell (aka where the devil resides). It's this sharp pain that comes and goes. I guess the housing in there isn't good enough for the demon. Let's call him Harry. So this Harry character has always needed to be pampered, he was a rich demon that never had to work. His parents saw this and kicked him out of their elegant home. I didn't even know I was renting my stomach, but here he is. If he blasts his damn rap music he is SO kicked out! I like to keep a friendly community. But he's causing trouble, causing me pain and such. DAMN DEMONS!

Join me again tomorrow when i discuss how i got rid of Harry.
(fades to black, roll credits)
(commerical break followed by next show)
(next show ends)
(next show cancled due to suck)

Update: the phrase of the week is brought to you by Danielle O'leary

"you can take it, SHOVE it, and like it."

Congrats Danielle. Now do you think you could repeat that for the class? Good old Mr.Personality.

Oh true. I got a new website now, Kickin' it Oldschool. The Newschool version just wasnt working as of yet.
Same rules apply here. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll share with the family.

Song I'm obsessed with right now- In the End by Linkin Park

I am nevous about not getting a part in the school play. Did the whole tryout, and call back jazz. Now its all up to "the man."

If you need some cheese, head on over to the O'leary's. They got plunty. And by plenty I mean a whole fridge full.