Today while killing some time during the "wait" section of the "hurry up and wait" part I randomly got the song "Shake It Fast" by Mystikal in my head. Namely the chorus. Naturally the co-worker I was with looked up the song lyrics so we could fully appreciate the wonder of this hip hop ballad to the ladies.

Behold:

I'm comin' with the fire like Aiyaaa! - What an ethnic name.
Chocolate and bowlegged, runnin' up behind ya - You know how hard it is to run bowlegged? You better stretch first. PS; Thanks for the chocolate.
Go 'head, get down, pop lock at the rockhouse - AKA my Saturday nights.
Girl, don't lie, you know you wanna go back to my house - I don't.
Man right'cher wanna get under that dress right there - If you're going to use right'cher once, why even bother to say it right later? It's insulting to ebonics.
Spicy cajun, we gon have a good time over there - I prefer spicy thai.
You better stick a head on that there crawfish - What?
You gotta bend all the way over to dance off this - Again, what?
Handle your business, 'cuz you know he do it way better - Business as in finances.
You're dead wrong - Are you arguing with yourself?
So if you totin' by and brothers make noise when you pass by - Totin'? not a word, sorry.
get on the dance floor girl, - You can't tell me what to do!
'Cuz this your song - I'm more of an Annie Lennox fan.
Do your thang, - OK, here comes the cabbage patch!
Don't be scured - I'm going to guess you failed English...
'Cuz you gon get served - Oh snap!
I'll get mine and you'll get yurn - What does that even mean?
Brothers thank that ass so lovely - You're welcome.
Raise it up, show yo g-string hustlin', hustlin' - Actually it's Hanes perfect fit.
Bend over, girl, show me what'cha workin' wit - I'm workin' wit dis right'cher!

It goes on. Feel free to enjoy it in it's entirety. I sure did.

It was my birthday this past weekend. I am now 26. Officially out of my early 20s and into the decade where I have to think about adult stuff like 401Ks, a house, career, settling down. Gross. I don't feel 26 at all and don't look at all like the people in their 20s on reality shows, whether it's Project Runway or The Bachelor (PS - if you are on The Bachelor that young, there is something wrong, did you even try the interwebs?). They seem so much older, but that's probs because I look 18. Let's just say the bartenders are always surprised.

To celebrate I went snowboarding as it is free on your bday. Totes aws. It was aReal crowded. I think everyone came to see me...OR it snowed for like a week previously. Whatevs. Since it was crowded I went over to the harder side of the mountain. I'm no expert but I held my own and am quite proud to say that I only ate it once; on the easiest part of the course. My tailbone is still feeling it.

A couple of fun things:

1. My pinky toe on my right foot feels numb. Kinda like pins and needles. Not sure what that's about but it's starting to get annoying. Perhaps it's nerve damage? I hope it magically heals itself because until it turns blue or falls off, I'm honestly not going to do anything about it.

2. On the way back down the mountain at night there was a patch of black ice that took my car for a spin right into the mountain. The car started to skid towards a wall of snow and of all the things I could have yelled I chose: "Oh dear!" We were actually super lucky that the people behind us didn't hit us, no one was coming up the mountain, the car only clipped the mountain so the bumper is chipped but otherwise fine, AND the best part; we didn't swirve the other way because there was no guard rail (good idea) and we would've gone off a cliff - 80s cop show style, probably blowing up on impact.

So yay I'm alive! Although it would have been kinda badass to die on my bday as well. And I'd have a pretty good death story for heaven, not to mention bonus points for not cursing before dying.