I've recently begun to fully appreciate soup spoons. Sure, I always liked the deeper belly but like a good neighbor I never really noticed them until they weren't there. Ever try to eat soup with a regular spoon? You can never get enough on the spoon to satisfy your hunger, especially if it's something like chicken noodle. The noodle is all slip sliding off. There just isn't enough surface area for me and I wind up manically slurping away. But get yourself a polite soup spoon and it's like he says, "Oh what's that? You got a bit of the shakes today. Relax, I'll do the heavy lifting."

Like an elderly woman who has a boy scout help her cross the street, I feel safer.

"Why thank you very much, young man."

My roommate Tina has a cat named Mr. Tice but about 2 months ago I came home to a note on my door saying we might have another guest living in the house. At first I thought it might be a person, that is until I found another cat hanging out under my bed.

Her name is Onyx. Since Tina already had Mr. Tice who was pretty territorial on her, Onyx drifted over to me. Now I don't pay for food or clean the litter box so you could argue she's not mine, but she spends her time in my room and has taken to sleeping with me at night.

She's a total sweetheart and I grew up with animals so I don't mind. Her meow is very low, almost like a whisper so I'm a fan of that. She has no front claws but she doesn't even play fight so it doesn't matter. All she really wants to do is sleep on my lap and eat - even after she was JUST fed...

She has taken to waking up early to inform me she is hungry and for awhile I tried to ignore it but she's pretty consistant. So I shuffle out of bed, hair a mess, no contacts in so I can't really see, and I'm gonna be honest - sometimes pantless. I slap the food in the dish and shuffle back to bed to catch another hour of sleep. I didn't really mind because I can go back to sleep pretty easily but when 6am became 5:30am I started to think - wait a sec, who is the pet here?

So now I get up, she runs to the kitchen, and I close the door. She can wait another hour.

Then later that week, I go into my bathroom and it smells kinda weird even though no one has been in there ALL day. So I'm smelling around - toilet is fine, garbage is fine. Where is that coming from? I was running out and figured maybe it'll be gone later. Hours later I return and I was literally running around so I'm all sweaty. I need to take a shower. I pull back the curtain and find...

Yeah, that's poop.

Now the litter box is in Tina's room and Mr. Tice and Onyx have NOT been getting along so I thought she didn't want to go in there to deal with him. But this happened more than once. She's still cuddling with me but I'm starting to think she's getting back at me...

Never come between a lady and her meal.