BIG UPS TO DA SUNDSTROM'S!
word kid
word

Today I remembered what I was gonna say yesterday. Do you know frustrating that is when you know you had something to say and then you fordet? Oh and that wasn't a mistype. I said fordet.

So what I was gonna say:
When I was working in the dining hall, which is SO much fun (please note the sarcasm), it twas all hollows eve. And so the dining hall people decided to get some music, and no they didn't play the radio, and they didn't play scary songs, they played rap. Now this is amusing to me because the city of Ithaca is in the middle of NOWHERE upstate NY. It's basically a suburban white area, and these people are walking around like they are from the bronx. I was just like...ok this needs to stop.

People of Ithaca, please realize that you are white and the rap thing that you try to do doesn't suit you. It makes you look fat. Take it off.

Phrase of the Week!! Goes to....Yvone (pronounced Eve-on)
Today while in my room I was making fart noises with my hand, a common occurance. My cousins taught me well. So there I was making Yvone laugh like it was my job and I got this really good one. So Yvone says:

I think that one had a poop in it.

Naturally at the sound of such a word I began to giggle. Gotta love poop.

Also, you HAVE to check out this website it is hilarious. Take the Insanity Test here:
http://www.vickysjokes.com/funny/insanity.asp
I am not skilled in the link area of the internet so you have to copy and paste that. But you look like you could use the exercise.

Da END!

Earlier in the day I was going through class options for next semester when I flipped to the Math section. Immediately I stated, Oh hello best friend, how are you doing? But it was real sarcastic like. Sudhanshu was in my room on the computer and said to me. You're a jerk.

I guess hating math and the rath it hast bestowed upon me makes me a jerk. So be it.

Daily Shout Out!
To: Food
Why: Hello, it's food. Why not?! Are you some kind of freak who don't eat no food. Yeah thought so tough guy. Sit down.

Today I...

Today I picked up my stole mini pumpkin from the dining hall, which my boss encourages us all to steal, and I noticed how hard it was. Them pumpkins must work out. Only I never see him at the gym. He's always perched above my tv. But I worry he will get too buff and one day will get mad at me for something ridiculous like keeping my socks with my shorts and then he'll use his guns, aka arms, to beat me senseless. Then the po-po will arrive on the scene and I will insist not to press charges because I love him too much. Damn them pumpkins! Handsome and irresistable...but deadly!

Take everything I say seriously.

Now I'm going to kick it really oldschool and do a lil segment I like to call Dictionary Tiempo (Time):

Todays word: mineral oil - a colorless, tasteless oil from petroleum, used as a laxative
Now for an example: After I got a nasty case of the runs, I decided no more mineral oil for me!

Once again Dave Letterman proves his Late Night Show is a quality program...for all ages! Allow me to explain why. No, please let me explain. Ok, now you are just being rude and interupting. Freaking jerk.

Best way to win my heart involves monkeys. (take a note boys) So anyways, Letterman has the recent survivor loser on and has his assistant ask him a question. So she asks, "Did you see or touch any monkeys?" An AMAZING question. Good Ol' Monkeys. They NEVER fail. Except when they die...

Daily Shout Out
To: Ms. Marie...Unkie George lost his reign.
Why?: Cuz she sent me packages like it was nobody's biz. Cookies AND a History of SNL. Uh...Yeah, she rules. She needs to look forward to a complimentary phone call and a surprise in the mail on it's way. Oh snap!

I got toothpaste on my sock. Only I am capable of such amazing feats.

My friend Rob Flack and I like to pretend we have blow darts in our lecture Psych class. There is a whole system to it. First forming the blow dart with both hands, and blowing the dart out...of course it hits any annoying people in the class. Most of the time we aim at our teacher who never has anything meaningful to say. However, there is this kid in the back row who always has some kind of bagged snack or snapple...Rob and I systematically look at each other everytime he attempts to open either of these products.

Advice: If you have a bag of chips, open it in one quick motion, DO NOT drag it out for 5 mins. More than likely you will feel a sharp pinch in your neck before falling unconscious. In this case, you my friend, can consider yourself blow darted.

Hardcore!