Barry White update:

Recently the beloved Barry White underwent some crucial kidney transplantness. There was a moment when they thought they lost him, but then they played one of his songs. The smooth, sexy, baratone, saved him from passing on. It brought him back and motivated him to be a Pimp Daddie to the fullest! Too true, too true.
Today in his honor, I came upon a song of his and sung it with pride.

In recent news:

Weekly World News saved the world yet again! It's not just another tabloid, Weekly World News means business! Last week, it was reported that China was going to attempt to get everyone to jump at the same time to send a huge earthquake across the world and knock it into space...thus ending the world as we know it. However, Weekly World News avoided disaster by applying a counter jump at the same time. But this time, when they heard about a second attempt, a writer flew herself over there to negotiate. Appearently it smelt bad in the airports but she survived and she talked the people out of the jump. What a hero.

Daily Shout Out!
To: Mr.Sullivan my advisor
Why: he told me bout canadian money...loonies, and toonies! Oh my...